A woman whose lover doesn’t make her feel beautiful – or worse, one who hints that if only she had bigger breasts, smaller hips and plumper lips, then things might be so much better – has three choices . . . fight, flight or go under the knife.
While it would be nice to think that fight or flight would be by far the most popular reactions, the reality is that, despite the risks, Irish women are increasingly opting for surgery in search of luscious curves.
Five years ago, 450 women had breast augmentation procedures at Advanced Cosmetic Surgery (ACS) clinics throughout the country. Last year, that figure rose by 300, confirming the suspicion that tacit man-pleasing is here to stay and that women are getting seriously cut-up over it.
Take Julie (not her real name): she had a boob job last Christmas at the behest of her picky partner and was delighted both with the result and the fact that her man seemed satisfied at last.
However, during the course of their first post-surgery row, on New Year’s Eve, he called her ‘Mrs Frankenstein’. It was the scars, you see – he found them aesthetically displeasing.
Many Celebs are admitting that they regret having surgery – .
But while it’s all too easy to blame the guys, it isn’t always fair to do so. According to counselling psychologists many men who buy cosmetic surgery vouchers for their partners are not acting selfishly but are genuinely trying to please them.
“Men are problem solvers,” she says “If they believe their partners genuinely don’t like their bodies, they will try to fix the problem. They do this, often without realising that all that may have been required of them was to listen and reassure.
“That said, the ‘because I’m worth it’ mentality is increasingly taking hold among women, along with the feeling of empowerment to do whatever it takes to improve body satisfaction.”
While you would imagine that at least part of the motivation for having a boob job would be to become more sexually attractive, surprisingly, none of the women asked as to why they wanted to have it done would admit to that. In fact, every one of them protested that their only motivation was to please themselves.
So there you have it: women want to look better and they’re doing whatever it takes to achieve this. But while nobody would deny the obvious attractions of a curvaceous figure, the question is, does it matter to men whether a woman’s assets are natural or acquired?
To find out, we decided to ask some men. This is what they said…
Alan “The day is gone when women who have had cosmetic surgery are perceived as being in some way freakish, outlandish, or even insane. For me, knowing that a woman with terrific cleavage has had a job done, is in no way a turn off, but having said that, I’ve never encountered it in a woman, to be best of my knowledge anyway.
“I don’t think that natural is necessarily better, it’s a matter of whatever makes the woman happy and confident. We guys don’t care whether it was Pilates or surgery which was responsible for a woman’s great figure – we just appreciate that she looks great.”
“There’s an old saying which still stands true: ‘It’s not the face, nor the figure, but the fascinating nature, that matters.’ I notice personality rather than looks and prefer when nature is allowed to take its course. I wouldn’t like to think that cosmetic surgery would ever become commonplace.”
Joe: “If I knew that a woman’s assets weren’t natural, I’d find it weird and off-putting, as those who have boob implants aren’t 100% human – they’re 1% silicone at least! However, if surgery raises a woman’s self-esteem and makes her feel great, that’s fine, provided she doesn’t end up looking like Joyce Wildenstein who in my opinion, look like A surgeons’ punch bag.”
Keith: “There’s a perception that only bimbos get boob jobs, which isn’t true – lots of intelligent and interesting women do too. For me, it wouldn’t matter at all whether a woman was surgically enhanced, once she looked and felt great, and more importantly was someone with whom I could have a conversation about Iraq
Craig Solicitor “If women are doing it to please men, they should remember that no guy would settle down with someone simply because of her big breasts. She would need to be stimulating intellectually as well as physically if the couple are to become mates – unless of course the guy has zero interest in her personality and wants her only for her body. For me though, corny as it may sound, it’s what a woman’s like inside that counts.”
Brian Actor “I can’t stand the appearance of scrawny women, but still, the idea of cosmetic enhancement doesn’t appeal.”
Simon TV Star “Personally, it’s not something I’d like, but professionally, I know that it can make a positive difference to the lives of actresses, for whom appearance is important.”
Rodge barman “I’ve always been a fan of natural boobs, like the enormous ones on Toni the Exotic Dancer. But when you’re my age, you don’t care if they’re full of milk or plastic – once I can get a look and a squeeze, I’m a happy man.”
Jeff Doorman “Since most of my long-term relationships have been with blow-up women, I’ve become quite accustomed to the joys of the enhanced boob. Mind you, with the amount of plastic surgery these days, it’s always a nice surprise to press the flesh whenever I get the chance.”
Joe hairdresser
“I think it’s trite to have surgery for cosmetic reasons only. It offers no more than a Band-Aid solution to larger emotional issues which probably need to be addressed. I would say ‘go natural, baby,’ as enhanced curves are something I could never take seriously.”
Stuart Nurse “Natural is probably better, but that said, cosmetically enhanced curves aren’t a turn-off, considering most sexual activity takes place in the dark anyway
Ian entrepreneur
“As far as I know I’ve never encountered surgically enhanced curves, but I’ve no objection to cosmetic surgery and wouldn’t be put off merely because someone had had it done. That said, I wouldn’t fancy going out with a woman who had a gargantuan Double Z figure – I think most men would be intimidated by that. Anyway, personality and connectivity are more important to me than looks.
“I was at a bar recently, in mixed company, when a crowd of obviously enhanced jet-blondes walked in. The women I was with hissed, while the men merely stared. Nobody approached or spoke to the enhanced. So while it gets women noticed, it wouldn’t lead to a long-term relationship if there wasn’t personality there too.”
Cath broadcaster.
“The thought of women opting for implants and having their bodies mutilated in the process, without good reason, makes me very uncomfortable. For me, natural is better, as unnecessary cosmetic surgery makes me squeamish and uneasy. When I see photos of Jordan, I think that while her face is pretty – from the breasts down, she looks sad.
“It’s a pity so many women believe that men rate them according to the size of their breasts. After all, men appreciate their beauty, no matter what the size.”
‘I was always very self-conscious about my lack of cleavage’
Mandy student nurse (30) and husband, Darren
“I had a breast augmentation procedure because I was flat-chested and there were tops, bikinis and dresses I wanted to wear but hadn’t the breasts to fill. Also, my sisters and friends had great curves and while they never commented, I was always very self-conscious about my lack of cleavage,” says 30-year-old Mandy
“It took me a long time to get around to having the operation done. Fear and money stopped me. Then two years ago I decided that it was time to be brave and to go for what I really wanted. So I got the money together and had the job done.
“When it was over, I was thrilled to bits. The team at Advanced Cosmetic Surgery were great, so if there’s anything else I want done in the future, I wouldn’t be afraid to go back there.
“My husband told me that I didn’t need to do it, but to be honest, had he asked me to do it for him, I definitely wouldn’t have – I’d have rebelled. It might sound like a cliche, but it isn’t at all when I say that I had the surgery for me and me alone. He sees the benefit of it, which is great, but more important is the way it makes me feel about myself. It’s been fantastic.”
Darren: “Mandys self-esteem rose after she had the work done. We’d been together 10 years before she had surgery, and I didn’t want her to change, as I loved her as she was. I never asked her to have it done or put her under any pressure. But I knew she was determined to do it, so I supported her in her decision. Now though, she’s got what she wants and because she’s happy, I’m happy. But at the end of the day, all that really matters is that we’re healthy and content with each other, and we are.”
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